If you have been following me for any amount of time, you will know I was a Figure Competitor. For 10 years I would enter Figure competitons and diet for 12-16 weeks to prepare. There is never a day that goes by that these extreme diets and rigid exercise programs I would follow do not enter my mind. These contests changed my life in terms of what my body should look like. My new standard was now being compared to my leanest, most dieted physique on that platform. That lead me into entering competitions as a way to keep chasing that look. My body had different ideas. Many atheletes who compete in physique sports will get health problems, including endocriniogy disruption, hair loss, digestion issues, and depression. Pair that with a distorted body image and disordered eating around food. Today I want to introduce you to a woman I am lucky to call my friend, whoam I have also hired to help me post competition heal my body after a decade of abuse. Let’s give a warm welcome to Jamie Postill.

Jamie, thank you so much for chatting with me about life after competining in the sport of bodybuilding and physique competitions. You have such an interesting story and I want anyone who is thinking of competing or who have competed and are now struggling with their body image or health to read this. **Disclaimer -Potential for body image triggers**

I will begin by saying, your body NOW is very lean and muscular, and I can imagine many who are reading this would die to have the body you are in now. However, when one becomes stage lean, it is an all-time unsustainable physique that you simply cannot keep year-round. Your normal as an athlete, even now, is not normal for 90% of society. Retiring and returning to normal life does not feel normal once you have been a pro in your sport.

Let’s begin this conversation by asking if you think the coaching space needs to offer more support to those athletes post competition? And are we setting up our athletes for potential body dysmorphia and disordered eating?

Jamie: I agree, a lot of women need to find that soft spot to land post show....I personally think it comes down to coaching. Many of these ladies don’t know/understand that you need to reverse out of the dieting process for just as long, if not longer than your dieting phase. It’s a process that needs to be done in a healthy manner, that alone will impact you mentally. Post my last show (the Olympia in 2015) I was in “go” mode....I still wanted to continue competing. Thankfully, I had a great coach named Shelby Starnes, that talked me out of it....we only worked together for 6 weeks but he said because he had to prep me so harshly, that continuing on competing that season would be detrimental to my overall health. I listened and worked with him on a healthy reverse, it too 6 months to get back to a normal weight. Now hormonally, I was a DISASTER. Periods all over the place, moody, cranky, sleep and digestion issues....I was a hot mess.

Deanna: Wow, see this is the dark side of competing no one talks about. It really is harmful if you have the wrong guidance, you could do some sever damage. Please, go on.

Jamie: By the time 2018 rolled around and I was still suffering, I found a great Naturopathic Doctor who I worked with. My first appointment was an eye opener.....my test levels were close to 300 (normal for a male is around 30) and I had literally no other hormones. He told me we had our work cut out for us but I would likely never have a child as a result. So, worked with him for 2 years quite closely, got everything re-balanced, got down to 155 (I competed at 162) without dieting and felt fantastic. Then I got pregnant, lol.

Deanna: The drugs women use in high levels of competing definitely come with consequences not often spoken about. I know you were really happy to conceive and be able to restore your health. I am not sure everyone can say the same! How was the pregnancy experience for you?

Jamie: Pregnancy was ROUGH....I was super sick and low energy the entire time, I existed on carbs and sitting on the couch, lol. So needless to say, I gained a ton of weight. My hormones thankfully were fantastic while I was pregnant though but I had to stay on progesterone the entire pregnancy as it kept dropping (leads to miscarriage if it’s too low). After Nicholas was born, I was sitting around 220lb and pretty uncomfortable but I had a totally different head space. I know I had gained the weight for a reason. Started working with the ND again and low and behold, my thyroid had completely tanked during pregnancy (totally normal thing for it to do)....it’s taken until now (almost 2 years) to get it back to normal and now my hormone panel is pretty much perfect. Yup, I had to work through a ton of personal stuff to accept what my body was going through not just during pregnancy but these last 2 years post pregnancy as this has been some of the hardest weight to lose!

I actually did talk quite a bit with my therapist and it all came down to self-compassion, something I had to completely learn how to do. I think that greatly helped me.

Deanna: This is why I wanted to talk to you today. I am seeing so many retired atheletes that are so hard on themsleves because they have gained weight and their bodies are changing. . Almost like since they retired, they are less than....and they are doing things like working out all the time, needing to eat a certain way and really feel the pressure to still “look” like an athlete. I often would gain weight and right away look for a contest to get me back into the rigid dieting again. I was injured, sick, bulimic and extememly depressed. Another figure show was NOT the answer. However, there are many women who I know that leave a contest and go right back into a normal life. Do you think that people can compete in a physique contest and go on to maintain a healthy mind and body? Are bodybuilding contests a breeding ground for eating disorders [EDs] and body dismorphia?

Jamie: Yes. I do feel the sport is a breeding ground for ED’s, for sure....but, not everyone goes through that experience. I think prep diets are a form of disordered eating itself but can lead to even more ED’s, depending on your post show experience and mindset. It’s a slippery slope for sure. I have lots of clients that have gone through the process relatively well and haven’t developed and ED but I also have ones that the minute the show was over, they ran for the hills and I believe had ED’s. I think the big difference is your coach....and working with them post show and understanding the process is more important than the prep itself. A lot of coaches don’t get this or don’t practice it, I personally feel it makes ALL the difference and is the only reason I continue to prep clients.

Deanna: Speaking of prep,I was going to ask if you still prep clients for contests. How do you manage expectations with clients who come to work with you for a show prep? Do you have some sort of screening system?

Jamie: Yes, I do. I make sure they understand that post show, we’ll be continuing to work together for minimum 16-20 weeks reversing and stabilizing their body. I make sure they understand the weight gain and the mental implications that will have and if they’re ready for that. If I have a client that is scale obsessed or scared of the scale, hell no they shouldn’t compete! They have to be OK with what they see in the mirror, despite a number and they have to be OK with doing the mental work that comes along with show prep. So many coaches miss this mark and I think it’s really tainted the industry in a bad way.

Deanna: Well said. I know after my contests, I had no post competition plan. So, being that I was already so disordered, I continued to diet on my 6-8 pre-contest foods because I was obsessed with keeping my abs. This was ON ME. I didn’t tell my coaches that I was strugglig because I was emabarrased. It seems like the industry is much better at working with their clients post contest, being that so many have spoken up about the damage they were left with long term. So, here’s the big question I am dying to ask you, are you thinking you want to step on stage again? I won’t lie Jamie, I get the urge ever so often, but I know that I couldn't do it and not resort back to my eating disorder, but what about you?

Jamie: I still don’t feel like I’m done, lol. Crazy, I know. Part of me just wants to prove to myself that I can still do it....the crazy diet, intense training and cardio, the mind games. That I can still stand on a pro stage and hold my own. Part of me also wants to leave the sport at my very personal best, leave on a high note. I wasn’t at my best at the Olympia, I feel I could have looked much better. Part of me wants to crush that look and see how I’d look now after having a baby and being almost 43. Mentally, I don’t give a shit about placing or chasing shows....I wouldn’t be going back to it to do multiple shows and get that win. It doesn’t mean anything to me anymore but doing the process again with my current headspace does. I hope that makes sense. All that being said, I doubt I will get back onstage....my biggest reason is my son. The time I’d need to spend away from him isn’t a sacrifice I’m willing to make as a single parent. He deserves all of me, not just the time I can spare when not in the gym.

Deanna: Thank you for being so honest. I honeslty look at you and think “how could she be any better than that Olympia showing”. But you are the master of your craft. We are always our own worst critic for sure. Your life has these new wondeful priorities and you are healthy and much more balanced now. We are the same age and I feel like my hormonal profile just wouldn’t be very happy if I did a contest, but I will not lie, I wonder what I would look like with the new muscle I have put on up there in those lights! Again, once a competitor always a competitor. You just don’t wake up and forget. Are you currently working with a coach?

Jamie: Right now, I’m working with Shelby Starnes again on body recomp.

Deanna: Can you tell the readers what body recomp means?

Jamie: Body recomposition....it means basically staying the same weight (not having the goal of weight loss) and changing your body fat percentages. In my case, that means building muscle...you can't burn fat without a decent amount of muscle! Recomping your body is TOUGH work, physically and mentally. If the scale isn't going down, we take that as a bad thing....but it's not! Pictures and measurements tell the true tale of how we are responding. If we're getting stronger and looking fitter, then we're recomping sucessfully.

Right now, I'm focussing on that and just being the best me. It feels amazing to be in a routine and have the structure, without the pressure of a deadline or a show looming in the background. That itself may be why my head is where it is....I know if I threw a show into the mix, this might change and it's not something I want to give up right now. I like where I'm at.

Deanna: I love that so much. Thank you for sitting down with me and talking about this topic. I know we could talk about bodybuilding, physique culture and meathead shit all day. Post show life is a “thing”… former athletes need a platform to talk about. I want to help retired athletes accept their new reality. I want them to remember what they had to do to maintain their ompetition body?
We went to extremes.
Extremes with training and some of them, pharmaceuticals.
Extremes with eating.
Basically living all things extreme, as it’s what it takes to be an elite level athlete!.

And extremes for the long haul, are NOT healthy. But, you looked the part! You hit our goal weight and you looked “shredded”. So that means you were successful? Right? Once we have acheived that extreme, we confuse that for normal. We should npt confuse extreme for health. But the two are not the same. So, to the retired athlete, i get it. I get how unbelievably uncomfortable you feel in your body post-comp. Please reach out to Jamie or myself if you need a coach to help you navigate this.

Love you Jamie!

Jamie: Deanna, like you it’s something I’m VERY passionate about and could talk for day on competing and post show life!!

** Note: I am not a writer- this is a candid conversation Jamie and I had and I wrote it exaclty like we were talking over a cup of coffee! :) Candid and fun.

Jamie Postill: https://212fitness.ca/contact/